The Mirror of Human Nature – “You Are Good!” (Terms and Conditions Apply)
I am good. (Terms and conditions apply)
This bitter truth about human nature is nothing but a reflection of our inner selves. It reveals the fragile boundary between selfishness and goodness, exposing the formal, artificial, and often superficial relationships we all maintain.
The Morning Realization
Picture a peaceful morning—you’re enjoying your tea when suddenly, an unexpected thought nudges you into introspection. Your gaze fixes on the world outside the window, your mind pauses, and long-suppressed emotions rise to the surface.
You find yourself wondering: What does it truly mean to be “good”? What is real selflessness? What does it take to stay in someone’s “good books”?
Consider the shopkeeper across the street. You’ve never expected him to keep his store open late. But if you ever do ask, and he says no?
Or that ever-friendly office colleague—you’ve never vied for the same promotion. But what if you need help during overtime, and he declines?
Or the neighbor who felt like family—until you needed a loan or emotional support, and suddenly, they weren’t available?
The Aerial View
Looking at human behavior from a distance—an aerial view—offers clarity.
Often, we judge people by what’s in the display window, forgetting that what’s kept in the warehouse may be very different. Sometimes the warehouse holds what’s never displayed at all. And sometimes, people showcase just a little, keeping the rest stored away until absolutely necessary.
As long as someone’s choices don’t interfere with our life, as long as their failure doesn’t dampen our hopes or their success doesn’t bruise our ego—everything seems fine.
The Reflection of Need
But expectations change everything.
This isn’t about blaming anyone—it’s about recognizing that everyone’s goodness has a threshold. The traits you don’t normally see emerge only when a real need arises.
Say you admire someone. You’ve shared warm conversations. But when a situation compels you to seek their help—financial, emotional, or otherwise—and they can’t help, the admiration quickly turns to disappointment. Suddenly, that friend feels distant. Their warmth feels cold. You start labeling them selfish.
The Twist in the Tale
Now here’s the real twist: What is goodness anyway? What is selflessness? What does it mean to be a good person in someone’s story?
Are you truly unselfish? Am I?
The truth is, we all have limits—limits shaped by time, situation, relationships, and even emotional bandwidth. And these limits are constantly shifting.
So yes—You are good! (Terms and conditions apply).
And I am good (terms and conditions apply).
The Mirror Reflects Both Ways
When someone approaches us with expectations, we too respond based on our realities, our mental space, and our priorities. The same cycle repeats: Just as we felt let down earlier, now someone else feels let down by us.
The Unwritten Social Contract
There exists an unspoken rule: You are good only as long as you keep doing everything for others.
We’re all caught in this cycle—trapped in the current of duty, appearances, and emotional debts. Even with awareness, escaping this spiral is nearly impossible. Because actions performed out of obligation rarely yield satisfying outcomes.
Reflection with Honesty – (Terms and Conditions Apply)
Ask yourself honestly: How much of what you do for others is from the heart, and how much is just mental calculation or social obligation?
How much of our “goodness” is real and how much is curated—designed for applause, validation, or just to avoid judgment?
We live in such a performative world that many of our actions are no longer for ourselves but for the timeline—for followers, for optics, for social approval.
The uncomfortable truth is: being good—even to ourselves—has fine print.
Why? Because no one enjoys being labeled as selfish. And yet, the moment we say no, the tag gets slapped on. People change their opinions. And we hate it—even though we know we’re doing the best we can.
Our Expectations – A Reality Check
Often, I try to objectively evaluate the expectations we carry—both those we place on others and those others place on us.
We tend to take people for granted. We assume their goodness will always be available, constant, unconditional. But when it comes to us, we defend our limitations. We argue our context, our timing, our priorities.
And in doing so, we forget that the other person may be dealing with their own invisible load.
People Aren’t Bad – Situations Are
It’s wise to embrace this simple truth: People aren’t bad. Times are bad.
If we can truly accept that everyone—including you and me—is good only up to a point, we’ll learn to build better, more transparent relationships.
Plus Points, Minus Points
Acknowledging this doesn’t make us pessimistic. On the contrary, it liberates us. It helps us step out of our fantasy world and into reality.
Let’s welcome each other’s virtues, but also accept the flaws. Let’s be thankful for the times we received help, instead of bitter about when we didn’t.
Let’s understand and accept people as a whole—with both their plus points and their limitations.
Because ultimately, the secret to strong relationships is not demanding perfect goodness, but understanding the beautifully imperfect reality of being human—with all the terms and conditions that come with it.
